I said in MY bed... bitch

so that whole thing the other day with my beau's ex was really part of another discussion they had... a discussion that by beau forgot to tell me about.

see the saturday before the drama he drops off the baby and she says to him... let's go get a bite to eat so we can talk. let's leave behind all the resentimientos y enojos... he says to her no. that the only thing he wants with her es una relacion de padres. and all they have to talk about is things concerning the baby. anyways he says... i have a girlfriend and it's really not right for u to be asking me these things now.. it's disrespectful... the next week she's going psycho on him...

so i'm pissed.. ok not pissed but bothered.. for two reasons.
1. the crazy bitch did disrespect me when she went after what's mine.. and i can't do anything about it cuz she's crazy and if i step up to her then it will just create more problems for my beau and his daughter... it's not fair but that's what happens when u date a man with a child... the other woman is always there!!
2. he didn't tell me about this till yesterday. maybe he knew it would bother me and that's why he didn't say anything?

i know he doesn't want to go back to her. i know he's happy with me and things are going great. so all i can do is sit and trust him. and keep things going how they are going... going good going strong.. haha.. whatever.

but like i said he's sleeping in my bed now.. let it go bitch. he's mine. for now.

en mi cama

my beau sleeps over my house all the time. i think it's because at his place it gets lonely.. at my house... he can talk to my parents.. watch ecuavisa and hey i'm here too... but he sleeps on the couch or the guest room cuz he says he doesn't want to disrespect my parents. and then there is that fact that my mother has warned me... no quiero que me metas a otro hombre a mi casa... so i never pushed it...

the other day my beau started complaining of back pain.. the couch was a little too uncomfy. so i tell him to sleep in my bed. i'll sleep on the pull out. he says no.. i insist..he gives in.

yesterday... i convince him to sleep in my bed again. i stay up playing a video game (i'm a gamer.. i'll admit it) my mom comes in and asks me where he is.. esta dormido en mi cama... she tells me.. well where are u gonna sleep.. here on the pull out... that's dumb she says... just sleep with him.

i swear i thought my mother had been body snatched... what came over her? i know she really likes him. but there is a problem.. i know that my mother thinks that he's the one for me... but we've only been going out for 6 months. so her letting me sleep in the same bed with him in her house is a little worrisome for me... because well i'm not gonna marry the guy and maybe she thinks i am and that's why she's ok with it??? or maybe she just wanted me to be comfy?

whatever the reason i slept in my beau's arms yesterday... and i was comfy. till he asked me why i slept in the same bed with him... if my mom was gonna be upset.. i told him that she said it was ok. then he got a worried look on his face... which was quickly replaced with the let's not waste a perfectly good bed face... :0)

so it seems that there is someone other than mala that reads my blog... karma send me a note!!

baby mama drama

which is to be expected when u have a messy split and a messy divorce on the way... but this bitch is loca just plain loca...

she and my beaus's daughter.. we'll call her boo(as in boo from monster's inc) were supposed to go to orlando last weekend... but they cancelled the trip and since my beau has her on the weekends we decided to take her to the gala with us. he bought her a dress and dressed her at her house... he told boo's aunt that he would bring her back early the next day but the aunt said no.. there won't be anyone here so keep her till late...

my beau took the day off from work the next day and spent the whole day with me and boo... but of course.. nothing is perfect. his cell phone got cut off and apparently boo's mom was calling all day.

when we drop off the baby the woman comes downstairs and starts screaming on my beau(thank god i was in the car and didn't hear anything cuz the bitch would have been in the hospital). she had been looking for him... went to his apartment and called his family members... where was the baby.. cuz he wasn't home.. he tells her the baby was with him.. she screams where were u? none of ur business... the threats and curses start... "the baby has no business sleeping in the same bed u sleep with another woman on"... like i said bitch is crazy... then she says that he has to give up paternity rights.. not gonna happen.. she kept screaming and my beau walked away.

he was upset... he tells me... see i told u my life was complicated... but now ur stuck... i'm not stuck i told him.. i want to be here with u... crazy bitch or no crazy bitch.

i guess i'm just a drama loving freak...

Noche de Gala

Friday became one of the most stressful days this year. well it's always like that the day of the LUCHA Gala at NYU. I had to run around like a headless chicken doing crap i should have done a long time before. things like getting my haircut and buying clothes for the event. i was in such a hurry i couldn't even wait for mala to come help me at the mall.. so i had my mommy help me pick out stuff...

but i was feeling a little better... cuz my beau called me early in the day and asked me what time i was picking him up. i said oh ur going? of course he said. i bought the baby a new dress and we'll be ready. hehe didn't have to spell it out for him after all.

so i do everything i have to do... my beau ended up coming to my place and getting ready with the baby (she had the cutes little baby blue dress on and pigtails in her hair). he did one of those wow ur beautiful things when i came down from my room...

we got the the event a little late. Mala and the mapucherican was there waiting... her usual punctuality next to my fasionable lateness or chronic lateness?

we danced, we talked the baby stole the show... everyone fell in love with her. everyone in my family met my beau. food ran out which sucked ass but there is always something that goes wrong at this event. so needless to say that we were all hungry... so hungry that on the way home we had to make a pit stop at crown chicken... fo real!

aside from the fact that this day represents such a sad thing i was happy on friday. my best friend was there... my cousin... my beau and his little girl. we had fun... making fun of the mermaid(i'm not kidding there was this chica in a mermaid outfit)...laughing at each other. it was nice. it felt normal. how abnormal is that??

do i have to spell it out for him?

this friday at NYU the latino group LUCHA is having their annual cultural Gala. My brother was a memeber of the group when he attended NYU before he was killed 13 years ago. So every year at the gala they commemorate his life/death. my whole family goes. For some reason lucha screwed up this year and we got the invites late and stuff. so now a lot of my family can't make it. some have work and other just live too far to travel at such short notice. My Beau found out the same day did. he said he would go. yesterday he tells me that he may not make it because he has to work till late and pick up his daughter. Now i understand that he has to work. but this is really important to me. this is one of the hardest nights for me because i have to relive one of the worst events of my life. i want him there. yesterday he says to me... i have to go right? like it's being forced on him. so i tell him no u don't have to go. so now i don't think he's gonna go. do i have to spell it out to him how i want him there? i mean he should try to be there for me right? and if i tell him then he's gonna feel forced and i don't want to force this on him. boys are dumb.. i hate boys.

spotless minds revisited

a couple of months ago i wrote a blog entry about the movie eternal sunshine of the spotless mind and how it made me feel... i saw the movie again yesterday at my beau's house and what the fuck was i thinking back then?

maybe it also has to do with the fact that i saw the midget on sunday on the escalators of the 7 train with his new chica. how i started laughing when he turned pale as a ghost when he noticed that i saw him and was going to say hello... and i didn't because although i was tempted to be all overly friendly in front of his girl i didn't think it was worth it. because he wasn't worth it.

see i thought that i was heartbroken cuz he dumped me... but what i was upset about wasn't that he dumped me.. just that i got dumped. i fell in love with the idea of being in love... even though i created something in my head that wasn't really there... it could've been anyone... i would have still been weepy and all please let's try again even though i know we are doomed.

maybe it's cuz i'm with someone new and i'm positive about the way he feels about me. maybe it's cuz things seem to be going forward instead of backwards... maybe because i'm at a point where i want to be with him specifically and not just anyone. and maybe it's because i came to my senses that it's not ok what the midget did... and no matter how nice it was to be with someone the bad things matter too... just as much as the good. and i shouldn't have to settle for a couple of good moments when our whole relationship was just one bad thing.

so it's ok to say ok when it's worth it.. and the midget wasn't... but i am.. cuz i'm cool.. :0)

i got him fired.... 12 years ago

and i just realized like a month ago.

my 10th yr high school reunion is coming up (not that mala and i are expecting a red carpet to be rolled out for us.. we were the trouble makers). Mala and i have been remembering all the shit we used to do. there are some funny stories. and then i realized.. oh shit... i got our old history teacher fired.

Mr. D was fired for misconduct at the end of our sophmore year. He was accused of being improper with a girl in our school. we never knew who it was (at least i didn't). but we always thought it weird that he would do something like that cuz he seemed like such a chicken shit.

we loved making Mr. D's personal life public... cuz the bruto would tell us... and i was always the one asking. see i had this talent of getting our teachers to go off on tangents and not lecture.. which meant no homework... postponing of tests and such. every teacher had a topic that got them started. mr. d's was his personal life... it usually went like this...

--yo FEA, i didn't do my global hw
-- i got u
my hand would shoot up...
-- mr. d did u go out this weekend? with a woman i mean.
he would answer like a dope. then i would ask where they went what they did... if they had breakfast together the next day...
other teachers knew that he was telling us this stuff. and they didn't like it. the principal didn't like it cuz he was a young man in a school full of horny catholic girls.

one day another student and i were on the staircase. he runs to catch up to us and we start running to get away. He's running up and i turn around and say.. hey ur a teacher u can't do that and started laughing and runnnig up the stairs... right intot the principal... what's going on? nothing just going to class.

so then we all found out that he was being called up before the catholic school board on misconduct. he was fighting it. we heard that he had accosted a girl on the staircase. my friends told me where her locker was. she was also being seen by the couselor in peer groups. we were pissed becasue although he wasn't the best teacher we knew he hadn't done anything.

last month i realized that the principal may have used my little staircase chase to fire him(accosted on the staircase) and i also realized that that locker... was my locker the year before. i was in a peer group. how i didn't realize this then i don't know.

a couple of years later another friend ran into mr. d and he asked how i was doing. i was confused then too.. why would he be asking about me? now i know... he was asking about the girl that got him fired. without even knowing. i was never asked if he had ever done anyting. i was never asked what happened on the staircase.. and i'm sure they never asked the other dozen girls that were there also. but i feel soooo bad. yes he was an idiot for talking about his women in class. and for letting a 14 year old take control of his classroom... he should have asked me to speak on his behalf or something.. but it was said he didn't want to call on any students.

it's fucking funny that 12 years later i feel horrible... i'm an idiot for not realizing then..
oopss.. sorry mr. d.

when did i become so bitchy?

i mean ... i don't remember being this bitchy.. was i always this bitchy?

this sunday we (mala and I ) went to the bridal shower of one of our old high school friend. I'm already a little pissy because my boyfriend wasn't invited to the wedding(there was a big fat 0 on the response card.

i love going back to the old neighborhood... only in brooklyn will u see a store called good night matress warehouse.. and right underneath it the translation... buenas noches tienda de colchon. or the signs outside a furniture store that say.. discount if you pay cash.. lay away available. it's like breathing a breath of fresh air... till u get to the north side.. then all u get is a whiff of the hipsters having tofu and wheat germ shakes or whatever it is they have... then i gagged

but anyways back to the shower. it was mostly her family. mala and i sat at a table with the bride to be our other high school friend and some of bean's(bride) cousins. across from us were sitting these two chicks. the waiter comes around and asks us for our order. the choices were panfried salmon, chicken marsala and riggatoni in vodka sauce. then the trouble began.... what's panfried asked one girl... the waiter explained (yes he has to explain because even though he said P-A-N-F-R-I-E-D very slowly he was met with blank stares). then... what's chicken marsala. mala and i stepped in to explain. then what's vodka sauce... we saw the next question forming on the girl's lips and we answered before she could get it out IT'S PASTA! then she says.. god all these fancy names!!!

huh??! now i'm not saying that i'm all that.. or anything of the sort but i will say that i couldn't look at the girl for a full 10 minutes. i did't know if i should laugh or feel sorry for her. i mean... who doens't knw what chicken marsala is? fancy words?? panfried? and after all the explanation... the food sucked anyways... go figure.

well i wish the bean all the luck in the world. better u than me...

anyone want to go have some food with fancy names??